Dating Dilemma: Are We Drowning in too Many Choices?

Something about technology makes everything simpler and yet more complicated. Dating used to be so easy. You meet someone who is attractive to you. You strike up a conversation. You exchange numbers. He calls you the next day. You go on a date. Then another. And another. The rest is history. Nowadays you’ve got all kinds of variables sprinkled in the mix and one of the biggest ones is the texting dilemma. Everyone wants to gain the upper hand by making sure they aren’t the first one to send a text and that they aren’t too quick to text back. I can’t tell you how frustrating this was when I was on the market. It’s an ever-present issue that plagued me up until I found my now husband. But even during my single days, I was always wondering in the back of my head: how will I ever get into a healthy relationship with someone when I can’t even get a consistent text back? The problem? Too many choices.

I am a firm believer that while having many choices appears to be a good thing on the surface, in the end, it can actually cause us to not choose at all. What happens to so many single adults who are in the dating scene is that they know that they have a lot of options, so they don’t put as much effort into their current relationship. It’s a huge conundrum, because on the one hand, singles crave love and companionship (which is why dating websites are on the rise); however, they want to find someone who is perfect. As soon as the person they’re dating does something that they don’t like, they are too quick to move on to the next.

Instant gratification is what propels our society, but it could be ruining our love lives.

Even in married relationships, the need for instant gratification can be a constant struggle. The main source of contention between my husband and I is always rooted in selfishness. And I can’t help but wonder, was it this hard back in the day? Has the ease of our lives and the access to so many potential relationships caused us to sacrifice our understanding of true love and commitment? If it’s as easy as a swipe to the right, how much more are we willing to invest in life-long companionship with someone who may not fit all the criteria, but who speaks to our soul? We need to go back to a simpler time; maybe not technologically, but ideologically. When people were just people and love was worth the struggle.

What do you think? In a world of Tinders and Black People Meet, Instagram and Snapchat, have we made dating more complicated? Let us know what you think in the comments!